Pretty Nurse Wore Me Out Today

[Mike Ellis]

If you have to have somebody manhandle your busted wing, much better a pretty nurse than a bitter old min-wage socialized medicine type.

It is sad that something as trivial as a shattered wrist can render a guy as big and strong as me as weak as a kitten. A few weeks ago I was picking up anvils (literally), but when she took the above-elbow cast off of me my arm felt like it was bolted to the table. "Put your arm here for the x-ray please." "Sure thing miss...uggghh...grunt..." I couldn't have picked up a coke can with that left arm

I was surprised when they turned the arm over, because I had an incision running halfway to the elbow and 18 old-school stitches - the big brown ones - I thought it had been done with laparascopy. No problem until she pulled out the ones in my my wrist where it connected to the palm of the hand. Amazingly, those stitches were connected to my testicles. "Oh, your fingers are twitching, does this hurt?" "(sniffle) No ma'am"

Boy when they are washing and re-casting that arm they fling it around like a gorilla. I was glad to get out with it still attached.

After seeing the post-surgery X-ray, I can see why it wasn't done by lap. I have what looks like a big flattened spoon and nine hefty screws in there now - left wing should be diesel-ready when the cast comes off.

Until then, I truly am a right-winger